the unashamed

randoms-

2004-12-18T09:49:00.000-08:00

in every journey, there is a meaning.
in every conflict, there is growth.
in every action, there is a purpose.
in every moment of doubt, remember to believe in the Lord.

there is no road too hard when we walk by His side(:

ermm..heh wanted to leave some random thoughts behind
clairee(:

AnoTher BleSSinG

2004-11-22T05:14:00.000-08:00

Hi all, when I spoke to Ben after cell last Friday, he urged me to write my testimony but I had to take a few days to pray to God as it's hard to write down or describe the feeling that you feel when God touches you.

I was born in a Buddhist family where all my relatives were Buddhists but when I was young my parents decided to go to church and I went to Sunday School as I was too young to stay at home with my sister I was forced to go to Sunday School as I wanted to stay at home. But as I grew older I met more people and got to know more friends I went to Sunday School just to meet my friends. I continued this way even with my first church camp to Bin-tan where I went cause my friends were going. It was for my friends that I went to Sunday School and attended church camp until earlier this year where I attended a Youth Mountain Session in March during a camp. For those of you who do not know what is Youth Mountain it's a gathering of Youth on every first Saturday of the month at Oldham Hall Chapel to worship the Lord. Anyway during this Session there was an alter call where I was one of those that went up and I was prayed for and during that it was the first time I cried in public as I felt God touch me and I felt the guilt of all my sins since I started sining weigh down upon me and God touched me and he relived me of my burden and I also accepted Jesus as my lord and Savior that night.After that night I went to Sunday School not for my friends but for God.

During the worship on Saturday Night during the Sec 1 and Sec 2 camp, God also touched me and I cried again. Once again I felt all of my sins weighing down on me and I was forgiven just as before and I was reminded by the Holy Spirit of the time in the New testament where Jesus was being Baptised and the Dove of the Lord came down from heaven and the Lord spoke:" This is my son whom I am pleased with." and the crowd was stunned and speechless. I remembered that and it gave me strength to share during the debriefing that I was going to be baptised before going to Canada if I get my study visa. And besides a baptism is to be a joyful occasion and not to be kept within a few close friends but to be announced to the world that Jesus is my Lord and Savior for now and evermore. Some of you may ask why now I get baptised. The answer is simple, my parents wanted me to choose as you must choose with all of your heart as it is a choice you must make yourself.

Yours Truly,

Mark Lam

i BeLiEvE

2004-11-15T06:01:00.000-08:00

Hm...

Some of you might remember me as the weird kid in the corner during
church.

Some of you might think I'm being a stupid copy-cat for doing this.

But yeah.

Anyway, the camp was truly a wonderful experience.

I've been a Methodist since birth. I used to be one of those people who
went
to church solely to get my mum to get off my back...

I actually stopped Church for a while, as my mum didn't really want to
send
me to church, and catch up on 14 years of 2hrs sleep.

So. I stopped for 2 years.

Then, suddenly, I felt this sudden urge to go to church.

So, I bugged a friend (who left for the US) to bring me. And since I
was the
only person in my family who was going to church, I got another friend
to
send me (which currently, I feel very guilty for hitching a ride one
too
many times).

Basically, I really enjoyed my first time in Church (in 2 years). The
only
thing was, I felt like crap, because I had forgotten how to pray!

Yup. But it was the camp that truly brought me to believe.

For the first time in my life, I truly felt God.

I'm actually trying to express what i felt, but as you can see, I'm
failing
miserably here.

Yup.

But it was truly a miracle.

I checked dictionary.com on a whim, and this is what it said: An event
that
appears inexplicable by the laws of nature and so is held to be
supernatural
in origin or an act of God.

And it truly was an act of God. The Lord touched so many of us, some of
us
Christians who went to Church Camp just so they could spend 3 days with
their friends.

Now most of us truly believe.

At least, I do.

Thanks to the Committee members and Camp Commandent for doing such a
great
job. Camp was wonderful, meaningful, and just plain fantastic.

Nic.

our God is AMAZING(:

2004-11-15T05:54:00.000-08:00

halo everyone..

k.. first off.. why am i doing this in the first place?
haha. after reading andrew’s testimony.. this seemingly random idea popped into my head, like “why don’t you do the same?”
i kinda brushed it aside cos, well, i thought it was just another crazy random idea.. you know me and my..randomness. haha.
then today, i got a message from ben with the same suggestion..sooo...maybe it wasn’t so random after all..
so even though i’m still a little doubtful about doing this.. i figure there’s nothing to lose right?
and, well, if there’s one thing i’ve learnt at camp.. its that nothing’s a coincidence..so... here i am…
oh, another reason i'm sharing this?
i feel like running out into the streets proclaiming the greatness of our God; except i'll probably get arrested or something, so i figure this is good enough(: haha.

to be honest, i really didn't want to go for camp. the only reason i went was cos i was planning the games.. and cos i already signed up.. if i didn’t go i’d have to explain why and i didn’t really want to do that.. so..i ended up going for camp. haha.

the past few months have been really..weird. haha. full of ups and downs.. its like i’ve been playing hide-and-seek with God.
its been all-out war between God, me, and satan..
the thought of suicide even flickered across my mind cos it felt like there was just nothing left worth living for.. i felt really..lost.. i considered leaving cell, leaving church, skipping camp, dropping out of missions, dropping out of the worship team.. and the only reason i didn’t do any of those was cos i didn’t want to have to explain myself… it felt like i was living a lie..

on the last night of camp.. during the seemingly screwed-up worship.. i told Him everything.. how i wanted to trust Him but i couldn’t.. how i knew He was the answer but i didn’t want to believe it.. how stupid i felt thinking these things.. i looked up at everyone praying for each other.. crying.. and God said.. “this is my family..these are my children.. won't you join us?”.. and then i started crying cos, i dunno. it was all so stupid, it was such a stupid battle, i was fighting God at times which is really just plain stupid. i felt really really confused and lost and helpless..“it’s been long enough.. come back to Me.." He said..i wanted to, so so badly but somehow i just couldn’t..i felt so bad..

monday morning.. i woke up after a gooooodd rest (12 hrs! haha.).. and i made the best decision of my life. i was tired of fighting, tired of wasting my effort on this battle which was going nowhere.. so i just pushed away the doubts.. ignored everything satan was trying to say.. and i decided to follow Jesus.
sometimes you have to deny yourself.. ignore your feelings.. and just hold to the truth.. it’s a conscious decision to follow Jesus.
i know its gonna be hard.. but i also know that God will always be there.. and He is my strength when i am weak..
the mind is satan's battlefield.. but once you realise that the battle is not yours, but God's.. there's nothing to worry about.. and here's a secret: God always wins(:

you know how ben was talking about how life is a test.. and how sometimes God intentionally draws away to test you? well i asked him what happens if you fail.. and his reply was that
“the test goes on continually until the last day you live. you can’t fail it as long as you are still taking it… He is faithful and will wait patiently for you..”
and, well, its so true. our God is…indescribable. He’s amazing. He’s everything you could ever need.. and He loves unconditionally.. believe it or not, He wants you. i think it’s really unbelievable how He could want a sinner like me.. after how much i tried to hide from Him.. how i tried to avoid Him.. how i ignored Him.. why in the world would he bother about me? but He did. He won’t give up on you.. so don’t give up on Him.. yup.

yeah and we all saw how He turned a seemingly screwed up worship session into one of the most amazing ever.. well He can do the same with a seemingly screwed up life...
oh.. and if you ask me, the only reason a life would be screwed up is cos God's not the center of it.

anyway, i guess me going to camp wasn’t a coincidence after all. our God works in mysterious ways.. but He doesn’t play dice. yup.. He has everything perfectly planned out.. and He doesn’t make mistakes.. so just put your life in His hands (if you haven't already)..
i promise you wont regret it…

haha i cant stand it anymore.. GOD IS SO AMAZINGGG!! heheh.

take care & God bless(:
`debbie.

we start dying when we have nothing worth living for..
we start living when we have something worth dying for..

the lord working in my life

2004-11-15T05:52:00.000-08:00

dear all,

i was pondering and praying for sometime and i feel that i shd share wat i feel abt camp and how i came to know abt God.

i was the kind of person who would come to church just because my parents and friends came to church. my walk with God wasnt so strong and i only knew him as God, but in prefects camp last yr, i sort of relieved the goodness of the LORD and i felt that he came into my life again. As i was weak, he gave me strength n i felt that he was tryin to tell me alot of things which all fit nicely last night. The months after this camp, many of my friens from different churches came and asked me to join their church. I had no idea why but it seemed that they all asked me abt the same time. i could feel the Lord tellin me something but what?.....im still prayin abt it. I also knew that the Lord was tellin me something abt worship. In prefects camp the following yr, they supposedly lacked worship leaders and somehow i volunteered. and abt a month later, johannes asked me whether i could help in nov camp to being worship i/c. i aslo asked ben for some verses fm the bible on worship(i didnt noe why i did that....i think its b'cas i think the LORd is tellin me to use these versus to tell others abt worshiping the Lord....). I felt that everything was like fallin in place..... was this part of the Lord's plan for me?

At camp, i made many new friens and i got to know some people better. I feel that the camp theme, united in love and the verse was very meaningful and it reflected vry well on wat had happned during camp. On Saturday night, during worship, i felt the Lord's peace, grace and mercy. it was un- expressable..... cannot be explained. i aslo felt that i shd pray for each individual. which i did and i felt the Lord had made a miricle that night. As johannes said that everything was a mess and the Lord had turnd that worship session to become a meaningful and a worship session never to be forgotten. The nxt morning the pastor preached on the bread of life.... which shd never be broken( i think...) and that night, when i was doin QT(which i seldom do) i opened the book and it read 'the bread of life'.....i feel that this is not very coinsidental. i think of it as the Lord's doin. so i guess i'll pray abt it and see what the Lord has installed for me next.....after prayin and some help from ben….i guess the Lord has told me something…in John 6:25…

this verse came to my mind..." for i know the plans i have for you declares the lord, plans to prosper you and not to harm you. Plans to give you hope n a future" ......the Lord is workin in everyone's life would U like to share how he is workin in yours?

God bless n take care,
drew

hiz all

2004-11-15T05:11:00.000-08:00

dear all....

this blog is created by the wonderful youthful class of sec 2's(04) in BRMC..... the blog will contain testimonies of all sorts of which reflects how the Lord has worked in each of our lives. Please email your testimonies so that they can be posted..... we wanna noe how the Lord is working in Your life =)........ always rem..... jesus' blood never fails us.....

thanks and God bless......

drew